Unit 1: Social Skills
Lesson 5: Getting Along with Co-workers
OBJECTIVES
Complete "Who I Like to Work With" handout.
Explain what to do when you do not get along with somebody.
Identify appropriate behaviors and topics of discussion in the workplace.
MATERIALS NEEDED
Who I Like to Work With
marker board or something to write on
INSTRUCTIONAL FORMAT
This topic will be discussion based. Much of the skills needed to get along
with co-workers are covered in other lessons such as anger management, conflict
resolution, communication skills, and employer expectations. If a person
can master these other skills, she should be able to get along with most
people. This lesson works more on a person's attitude about the people with
whom he works. A person does not have a choice about the people he works
with, so they have to be understanding of the differences in other people.
They may not like everyone they work with, but they have to be able to work
with all types of people.
Discuss how we will not get along with everyone we work with. Sometimes we
don't like how they behave, sometimes we don't like what they believe in,
and sometimes we don't like how they look. Have the students fill out the
handout titled "Who I Like to Work With." Inform
the students that the handout is just for them, and they will not have to
share the information with anyone.
Review the terms "prejudice" and "tolerance" with the students. This will
help set up the discussion about how to separate disliking someone because
of what she does and disliking someone because she belongs to a certain
group.
Prejudice – According to Webster's Dictionary, prejudice is a
preconceived idea; an opinion held in disregard of the facts that contradict
it; and/or, intolerance or hatred. A person is prejudiced toward another
person when he does not like or has untrue beliefs about that person because
he/she is part of a certain group. The groups that are usually the focus
of prejudice are women, minority races, different religions, and homosexuals.
However, people can hold prejudices against any person of any group. All
lawyers are..., all people from the South are..., people who work in fast
food are... The person makes this judgement about the other person without
getting to know what that person is like. The judgement may be true, but
it has nothing to do with the group he/she belongs to; rather, it has to
do with what that person is like. Some examples of prejudices are: men are
only interested in sex, women are weak, Jewish people are stingy,
African-Americans are lazy, and Asians are smart. It is true that some men
are only interested in sex, some women are weak, some Jews are stingy, some
blacks are lazy, and some Asians are incredibly intelligent. But, you can
find these characteristics across all different groups of people. So, when
a person is lazy, it is not because of her race; it is because the person
is lazy.
The following is another illustration. A co-worker, who is black, takes two
days off because her son is sick. The days are during the busiest part of
the year for that company, and a co-worker automatically assumes she is lazy,
and says, "Isn't that typical of one of them." This assumption is wrong in
two areas. First, there are no facts to indicate that African-Americans are
a lazy race. There are some blacks who are lazy, but there are also whites
who are lazy. Laziness has nothing to do with race; it has to do with the
individual person. The second problem is that the person has neglected to
notice that this co-worker is one of the hardest working people on the job,
and the fact is, her child has had a temperature of 104 during these past
two days.
Tolerance – According to Webster's Dictionary, tolerance is
respecting the beliefs and practices of another person. Thus, when a person
does something a different way or holds certain beliefs, you do not condemn
that person or interfere with that person. That does not mean you have to
agree with that person, it means that you tolerate the way he does things.
On the job, there are going to be people who behave in a way that you do
not agree with. If that behavior is interfering with your job or the company,
you have the right to talk to that person or go to the supervisor. For example,
a co-worker may believe it is OK to drink on the job. You do not have to
tolerate this. Talk to her or your supervisor. On the other hand, if you
did not believe that using drugs or alcohol was OK at any time, you may have
a hard time tolerating when someone talks about the parties she goes to on
the weekends. If this is the case, you could ask that person not to tell
you about his partying on the weekends. But, most likely you will need to
tolerate the fact that he drinks outside of work.
In summary, when we hold prejudices about certain people and are intolerant
of their beliefs and practices (when they do not harm anyone), it makes it
very difficult to get along with others. It is important to get to know the
person for who they are and respect that person's beliefs. We are not going
to agree with everything a person thinks, says, or does, so working with
people who are exactly like you is going to be difficult. Remind students
that there are probably people who they are close to that have different
beliefs from them. Most people have arguments with family members and friends
over what they do and what they believe in, but we do not dislike those people
because they are similar to us. Therefore, we should not dislike people who
are different from us in skin color, religion, ethnicity, etc., just because
they have different beliefs or practices.
Discuss with people why they would not like working with certain people and
try to get them to look at why. See if people can recognize the differences
between not liking a co-worker because of how they behave (i.e., doing things
that cause problems on the job) and not liking a co-worker because of who
they are. This would be a good time to discuss the exercise on identifying
who the student would like to work with. Remember that the information is
intended for the student's own use, but allow students to share information
if they are willing. Pick out a few of the different "types" of workers and
ask the students the following types of questions:
"Is this a good reason to not like a person? Why or Why not?"
"Is that acceptable behavior at work? Why or Why not?"
"Did any of your answers change after our discussion?"
Make a list of alternatives of what a person can do when they don't get along
with somebody they work with. If it is because a co-worker is behaving in
a certain way that is bothersome or interferes with the job, the person can
talk to this person or speak with a boss. Role-play speaking to that person
or speaking to a supervisor.
If the person just does not like the co-worker, instruct the person to find
the positive in the person and try to focus on the good points of the person
when working with him/her. Have the student identify a person with whom he/she
has not gotten along and list both the positives and negatives of that person.
Discuss.
Discuss students' behaviors that make it difficult for co-workers to get
along with them. Have the students try to identify areas on which they need
to work.
Summarize the lesson by listing behaviors that make it difficult for people
to get along at work.
Talk a lot about their religious or political beliefs
Have a poor attitude or an unhappy disposition
Unwilling to help
Poor work
Absent or late a lot
Gossip
Talk too much
Unfriendly
Disrespectful to supervisor or co-workers
Tell supervisor about things people do wrong all of the time
SIGNS OF GENERALIZATION
Students are getting along better with co-workers. When they are not getting
along, they are attempting to make the relationship better by either addressing
the problem with the person, a supervisor, or changing their behavior or
attitude toward that person.
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