Social Skills: Handout 15

THINGS TO CONSIDER WHEN LIVING WITH A ROOMMATE

Look at your own behavior. Are you infringing on the rights of others?
Be honest. Being straightforward and direct can help resolve and prevent problems.
Do not let things build up. Address problems as they happen. Use assertiveness training to help in making appropriate requests for behavior change from a roommate.
If you have requested the roommate to change his/her behavior, give him/her a chance to change. Thank them for making attempts to change. This will be more effective than continually harping on them.
Be flexible about your roommate's lifestyle. It may not be the same as yours, but as long as he is not hurting himself or others do not try to impose your will on the person. If it is something that is bothersome, talk about it and get the other person's point of view. If a person's lifestyle is still causing too much strife, it is probably time to go separate ways.
Don't get taken advantage of. Be assertive when you think your roommate is making demands that are unreasonable. If you don't, you will build up resentment and the relationship will turn sour.
Agree to disagree. Even the best relationships will hit bad times. When there are points of disagreement in the roommate relationship, sometimes you have to agree to disagree. If it is an item that is too personal or bothersome, you may need to look for a different place.